When your child has both ADHD and autism

Your child doesn't fit into one box. That's because they're in two.

You've tried ADHD strategies - they help with some things but make others worse. You've tried autism supports - same story.
↳ Nothing fully fits.

That's not because you're doing it wrong. It's because ADHD and autism together (sometimes called AuDHD) create competing needs.

Why parenting feels impossible:

• ADHD wants novelty, autism wants routine - They need predictability to feel safe, but get bored with the same schedule. So you're stuck between a meltdown (too much change) and a shutdown (too much sameness).
• ADHD seeks stimulation, autism avoids it - Their body craves movement and input, but too much sensory stuff triggers overload. The park that regulates them also dysregulates them.
• ADHD impulse meets autistic rigidity - They blurt out the "wrong" thing because the ADHD brain moves faster than the filter, then spiral into shame because the autistic brain replays it for hours.

What helps:

When strategies clash, try: "Your brain needs different things at different times. Let's figure out what you need right now."

Then adjust. Sometimes routine wins. Sometimes flexibility does.

We wrote a full parenting guide for ADHD + autism that breaks down practical strategies for competing needs.

👉 Read it here: How to Parent a Child with ADHD and Autism.​

If you're exhausted trying to make sense of this alone, we can help.

Learn more about our services here.​

Nicole Robinson​ Principal and Clinical Psychologist, ProActive Psychology ​proactivepsychology.com.au​